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All goods unless otherwise stated are made by hand by our hard working and undervalued clerics.

They do not see the light of day but they don't need to and in truth like it that way so please do not write letters of concern for their welfare. Our curator oversees their welfare and generally she tolerates them.

Our policy is that if an item is in stock that it will be dispatched within 24-48 hours within the working week, that's the members of the public working week, not the 365 days a year that our clerics work. An email will be sent to you confirming dispatch.

Items will be sent generally by something called 'The Royal Mail' and they are not associated with our Grand Council or our membership body.

If they are useless this is not our responsibility and please do not harass your local post office with replica Scatterblades or the use of harsh language as that would be unbecoming of you. However, all items are sent in good faith and a proof of postage is obtained that can be sent to you if necessary. If a delivery is late you can contact one of our clerics by way of this website. Cleric number X13 generally responds. 

Thank you for supporting the Kat Chamber.


This is our genralised policy, please refer to individual products that carry their own policies along with our curators occasional wit.

This web platform allows you to order items made by our clerics and in this case what we've taken from the author as well. 


By placing an order through this website you will need to provide important information pertinent to your order, we do not provide your information to other third parties or will show up at your house. Your order information will be stored within the back end of the system provider that we use and our clerics have no further use for it. We do not use your information for other than notifying you of other products that we think you may enjoy. If you wish your email to be removed from our system please do notify us and this will be done.


We ship products through something called 'Royal Mail' or with a registered courier, on rare occasions a member of the Escarrabin may deliver it in person if there is no watcher activity.

We aim to complete all orders within 48-72 hours during the working week.


If a product is out of stock we will notify you within 48 hours and will inform you to the best of our abilities as to when the item will be available. If a product is out of stock indefinitely we will offer you a refund via the same payment method that you used. Refunds will be processed within 30 days but often much quicker.


If you require your order for a specific date please email us at so we can try to make the necessary arrangements.

We hope you like this bundle but If you are unhappy you can return it back to us as long as everything is unmarked and unused. 


In the unlikely event that the wrong product is sent to you, you may have been lucky and got something even better however please let us know as soon as possible and we will arrange a replacement for you if you are unhappy. If you can return the product unused and undamaged within 10 days. We will also credit you with the postal costs.


We cannot be held responsible for a package/s lost or damaged on return. It is recommended that any returns that are sent to us are by recorded delivery or by a service that has some form of proof of postage.


We do not divulge our headquarters address and a civilian one will be offered to you, returns can come there. 


Goods returned to us after 10 days have elapsed from the date of dispatch from headquarters will not be entitled to a refund. There is an extension to this policy for products that have been shipped outside of the UK, in those circumstances any extension of the policy will be solely at the curator's discretion. In exceptional circumstances if your return exceeds 10 days from the date of shipment from our offices you can write to us to appeal this decision. An extension to the returns policy is at the discretion of our curator.


We do not know what this is but apparently The Consumer Protection (Distance Selling) Regulations 2000 entitles customers to cancel an order within 7 working days of receipt of goods. Should you wish to cancel your order and return the goods you may do so but the goods must be returned at your own expense in the condition you received them. They should be returned with adequate packing and insurance to cover damage or loss. Upon satisfactory and timely receipt we will refund any monies within 30 days but why would you cancel anyway when there is a lot of good work to be done! 

Thank you for supporting the Kat Chamber!

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